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Almost

from My Kingdom As Great by Unwoman

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The first one I posted had the wrong audio! Fixing now!

This song is about the phenomenon that affects lots of us, especially femme people, where we wonder, when someone doesn't love us enough, what we did wrong -- are we not pretty or good enough? Are we not trying hard enough? Yet so often our partners seem not to try at all to meet our needs. We worry that we must be asking for something we don't deserve; we must be less worthy than we think ourselves.

It's a bit of a downer, but the next song "Breath Out," a companion piece, is not...

Yes, the first three lines are a Janis Ian reference. ("At 17")

lyrics

I learned the truth at 27
That love was really meant for no one
Still I tried to be a beauty queen

I have fit myself into smaller spaces
Tried on a thousand faces
In some vague attempt to be seen

It’s the almost, almost that tears me wide open
Almost good enough
Almost whole and I’ve almost been broken
Unlearning how to stay unloved

Do you remember when you told me
You’d do anything to keep me
And how quickly you forgot

Did I ask the impossible
When I needed tenderness
Did I ask you to be someone you’re not

It’s the almost, almost that kills me
Thinking I’m a just little better than anyone else sees
I’m eighty cents looking for a dollar
A rescued kitten too good for her collar

It’s the almost, almost that tears me wide open
Almost good enough
Almost whole and I’ve almost been broken
Unlearning how to stay unloved

credits

from My Kingdom As Great, track released May 31, 2016
image is Lady Lilith by Dante Gabriel Rossetti
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lady_Lilith

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Unwoman San Francisco

Based in the San Francisco Bay Area, Unwoman is a self-produced cellist-singer-songwriter. Layered with skillful cello, rich vocals, and electronically arranged beats, her solo music is a futuristic homage to her classical training. Unwoman has been featured at steampunk, goth, and sci-fi-related events all over North America and has collaborated with many notable acts. ... more

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